Whatcha Waiting On?

I opened my eyes and heard the words ‘whatcha waiting on?’ That happens to me a lot as I wake from the sleeping hours. I may hear words whispered to me in my ear or a thought runs through my mind. Sometimes, I get a feeling of knowing something without knowing how I know.

Today was no different. I opened my eyes and I heard words being whispered to me asking me what was I waiting on. I thought about it. Wondered what it meant and left it there. Coffee was far more important to me than figuring out what it meant. I knew it would come to me sooner or later. It always does. 

I poured my first cup of coffee, fed the cats, and stepped outside on the deck to take in the beauty of the Smokey Mountains. It’s my favorite place, my deck. I breathe in the energy of the mountains, the energy of the ancestors as my own ancestors draw near.

I love when they draw near. I feel their love. It’s so pure, so forgiving and gentle. Oh my is it ever gentle. I sit and they wrap their love around me. They talk to me. I share my fears and they reassure me all is as it should be and remind me of the strength I hold within. 

I share my dreams and in my minds eye I can see them showing me the key that unlocks the wisdom buried deep within my soul. They don’t tell me what to do. I wish they would. I do. That’s for sure. But, instead they just remind me that I have all the tools within to do whatever I choose. I cherish my time with them. I really do.

I gaze at the mountains ahead and wonder if the ancestors can see what I see. I invite them to come closer. I tell them to use my eyes if they wish. I feel them. They are much closer now. The usual chatter racing through my mind begins to slow down as they come closer still. The energy they bring is strong. I find myself beginning to move with the energy swaying side to side for a while and then it changes to forward and then back. 

I breathe. Say a prayer for Mother Earth and all her inhabitants. I ask for healing for those in need and I thank God for another day on Earth. My mind becomes still and suddenly all that is going on around me becomes muted. The sounds of the birds become distant. Indy, my cat, who is trying oh so hard to get her older brother to play with her as she runs from one end of the deck to the other begins to fade from my awareness. 

My breathing becomes rhythmic, my mind calm and the silence arrives. Breathing in and out, falling deeper into the silence of my soul. 

I breathe again and I’m there as if I’m transported in time to a place of serenity high above the valley on a ridge in the Smokey Mountains. I’ve been here many times before. It feels so familiar. Like home. I gaze off into the distance and just know that what I see is Tennessee. I know without knowing how I know, that Georgia is to my left and North Carolina is below my feet. I love this place. That’s for sure. I feel a connection here that runs through my bones straight to my soul.

Drifting deeper into my meditation, I become aware of my ancestors joining me on the ridge. This is their home. They know this ridge, these mountains, and the memories left behind. They reach out to me and I take their hands. Heartache pierces through me. Not my heartache, their heartache. Flashes of life as they knew it tumbles through my mind. It’s too much to bare. I want the images to go away yet, I yearn to know more about their life, their story. 

Grandfather, from five generations back, smiles and motions for me to sit on the ledge. He sits beside me. Without saying a word, he begins to speak. 

I listen. 

I watch. 

And somehow, I know what he is telling me. He points to the colors of the sky and explains the importance of color in the work I do. 

He grabs my hand once again. Energy is moving around us, my energy, his energy until it becomes blended into one. Just like that my colors blend with his colors. His thoughts become my thoughts. This is it. This is where two worlds meet. Where our worlds come together and he becomes my teacher. As much as I want to talk to him, ask him questions, I know that my role is to be still and let information flow from him to me. 

And so, I sit. 

I listen. 

I take it all in. 

Time stands still when I’m in this place. I become lost in the unspoken words of my grandfather. I love this space. I feel safe. I feel love. It feels familiar, it’s like I’m home. 

Over my shoulder, I can feel the eyes of an ancestor, I call mama. I don’t know why I call her mama. It just falls from my lips whenever she is around as if it’s what I’ve always called her from many moons ago. Mama is short in stature but mighty in strength. She’s endured more than any human should ever have to endure. She tells me she was a medicine woman. I’m not surprised. She is always showing me plants and when I need healing, mama comes. My bond with mama grows by the day. She is as much a part of me as anyone living. 

The warmth of her smile draws me to her and I know that my time with them both on this ridge is coming to an end. I don’t want to leave but, I know I must. My lessons for the day are over. 

And just like that, I see the two of them standing on the ridge smiling and waving as I slip away back to the deck, into the rocking chair, surrounded by the sounds of birds and cats fighting. Just like that.

I take a deep breath, wiggle my toes and here I sit. My full cup of coffee that I had to have right away is now cold. I don’t mind. I now know the meaning of the question I heard upon waking. Funny how that happens. 

I warm my coffee and somehow find my way to my computer. It wasn’t in any of my morning plans to sit at the computer. Sitting at the computer means only one thing, work. I think to myself, really? Do we have to do this now? Can I not have a hot cup of coffee first? 

The computer boots up and there on my screen was a video of a book publisher laying out the steps on how to get your book published. Hmm, wonder how that happened? 

I can tell you this. When the spirit world asks you a question upon waking, then guide you to a deep meditation before you ever get a sip of your much needed coffee it might be a good idea to listen because if you try not to listen, they will only find another way to get their message to you. That’s it. That’s all I’m saying on that. 

So here I sit at my computer writing because Lord forbid should I stray from this mornings question. 

Whatcha waiting on?

An excerpt from Kay's book The Evidential Medium: A Practical Guide for Developing Mediumship